This week I'm joined by Naomi Gale, a pelvic health educator, former teacher and author of two books. Naomi specialises in nervous system-led holistic pelvic care, and we cover a lot of ground, from why we should all be using the proper anatomical words to what vaginal steaming actually involves.
We talk about the pressure women are under to say yes when our bodies are saying no, why your symptoms might be feedback rather than a problem to fix, and how Naomi's first book ended up shadow-banned on Amazon. I loved this conversation, and I hope you leave it feeling a little more connected to your body.
Key Takeaways
Use the proper words. Knowing the difference between your vulva, vagina, labia and clitoris helps you explain what's going on to a doctor, and helps the next generation feel less shame.
Learn what your body's "yes" and "no" feel like. Many of us are conditioned to say yes, in relationships and in medical settings, even when our bodies are bracing.
Get curious before you label. Naomi's approach is that your body is responding intelligently to an overwhelming world. Before assuming a symptom is "just perimenopause", ask what else has been going on.
Keep cycle tracking simple. A pen and paper is a great place to start. Naomi cautions against relying on apps whose predictions are based on other people's data, especially when it comes to avoiding pregnancy.
Small practices count. Breathing light from your heart down into your pelvic bowl, or standing barefoot on the grass, are simple ways to start reconnecting.
Episode Highlights
01:00: Meeting Naomi, and what holistic pelvic care and working with the fascia within the vagina actually involves
04:00: Why anatomical language matters, from talking to doctors to talking to our children
08:00: Vaginal steaming explained, and why Naomi sees it as a ritual of self-mothering
13:00: Conditioned to say yes: consent, smear tests and learning to feel your body's no
19:00: A simple practice to try at home, plus Naomi's free meditations on Insight Timer
32:00: Why Naomi believes the body responds intelligently, and why curiosity beats assumption
41:00: Naomi's two books, and what happened when Amazon removed the first one
About the Guest
Naomi Gale is an author and guide whose work lives at the intersection of women's bodies, folklore, and the gendered stories that have kept women estranged from themselves. She works with undermothered women, holding them as they return to safety in their bodies, and particularly in their pelvis where creativity, grief, instinct, motherhood and identity converge. Her work draws on nervous system science, body-based practices, myth, and the long tradition of what culture has done to women's inner lives. Through writing, speaking and education she creates pathways back to embodiment that are both practical and deeply personal– translating complex ideas into grounded language and narrative that makes women say: this is me.
Mentioned in the Episode
Ground Floor the Book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1066910901 
The Community Circle: https://thisisnaomigale.co.uk/vagina-workshop/ 
My website: https://thisisnaomigale.co.uk/homepage/ 
Insight Timer for free meditations and specific one
Ground Floor, the podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/ground-floor-on-vaginismus-vulvodynia-and-other-ways/id1498365947
Vaginal Steaming reviews here.
HPC
End Credits
This episode was written and recorded by me and produced by Lucy Lucraft (lucylucraft.co.uk). If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a 5* rating and review!
 

This week I'm joined by my friend Jen Bianchi, a dentist with nearly 20 years' experience, to talk about something we hardly ever hear in the perimenopause and menopause conversation: our teeth. Jen explains why the mouth is the gateway to the rest of the body, what bleeding gums can tell us, and why getting the basics right beats any miracle product.
We also dig into dry mouth, the sneaky sugars hiding in squash and herbal teas, burning mouth syndrome, and what we do (and don't) know about HRT and gum health. It's an honest chat about science, stress and why we so often put ourselves last on the list.
Key Takeaways
Healthy gums don't bleed. Gum health is linked to cardiovascular disease, diabetes and stress, so bleeding is worth acting on.
Do the basics well. Brush twice a day for two minutes with a pea-sized amount of fluoride toothpaste. Spit, but don't rinse, and clean between your teeth.
How often you eat matters as much as what. Keep sugar to mealtimes, choose savoury snacks, and stick to water or milk in between. Watch out for squash, herbal and fruit teas, and extra strong mints.
The research on perimenopause, menopause and teeth is still limited. Busy lives, medication and dry mouth all play a part. If you have burning mouth or recurrent ulcers, ask your GP about iron, B12 and folate.
Dentists aren't there to judge you. If life has got in the way of your check-ups, just book in. When it all feels like too much, start with one thing.
Episode Highlights
02:00: Why dentists call the mouth the gateway to the body, and what gums can reveal about heart health, diabetes and stress.
04:00: The basics: how long to brush for, why you shouldn't rinse after brushing, and where mouthwash fits in.
09:00: What the research does (and doesn't) say about teeth in perimenopause and menopause, and how overload affects our dental health.
12:00: Why constant snacking keeps your mouth under acid attack, and what to eat and drink instead.
20:00: Burning mouth syndrome in menopausal women, and the link to iron, B12 and folate.
40:00: HRT and gum health: what we know, what we don't, and why it's so hard to untangle.
50:00: Jen's three things to take away, including why "back to basics" is the message.
About the Guest
Dr Jen Bianchi isa a dental surgeon, partner and practice principal at The South Street Dental Practice in Elgin, Moray. Having spent her career workign in general dental practice in Moray, Jen has a particular interest in holistic, family-focused dentistry- looking beyond just teeth and gums to consider the health, wellbeing and individual circumstances of the person behind the smile. 
Website: https://southstreetdental.co.uk/
Instagram: www.instagram.com/southstreetdental
Mentioned in the Episode
My previous episode with Caz, the GP
Up next: GP episodes answering your questions. Send me your questions by DM and I'll put them to the doctor.
End Credits
This episode was written and recorded by me and produced by Lucy Lucraft (lucylucraft.co.uk). If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a 5* rating and review!
 

Perimenopause crept up on me, and I genuinely didn't know it was a thing until I was in the middle of it. So for this episode I've invited my friend Dr Caroline McKenzie Hill, known to me as Caz, to give us the GP's view. 
We keep things broad today. We cover when perimenopause can start, how to tell it apart from burnout, the symptoms nobody warns you about, where HRT fits in, and how to prepare for a GP appointment so you feel properly heard.
Please send in your questions too, as Caz will be back to answer them!
Key Takeaways
Perimenopause can begin in your thirties and last up to ten years. It's diagnosed from an accumulation of symptoms, not a single blood test.
Not everything is perimenopause. Burnout, low iron and low B12 can look very similar, so it's worth getting checked.
Track your symptoms and your cycle for a couple of months before you see your GP. It gives you evidence and helps you spot patterns.
Symptoms go well beyond hot flushes. Think irritability, brain fog, low motivation, vaginal dryness, UTIs, skin and hair changes.
Don't suffer in silence. Book a double appointment, or two, if you have a lot to cover, and lead with what's bothering you most.
Episode Highlights
03:00: Why perimenopause creeps up on us, how long it can last, and what "menopause" actually means
10:00: How symptom and period trackers help you advocate for yourself
12:00: Caz's own story of mistaking burnout for perimenopause
17:00: The wider symptom list, from hot flushes and night sweats to irritability, brain fog and low motivation
23:00: HRT, contraceptive options in perimenopause, and why hormone blood tests aren't much help
29:00: Vaginal symptoms, libido, UTIs and why vaginal oestrogen can help
40:00: How to make the most of a short GP appointment
About the Guest
Dr Caroline McKenzie Hill is an NHS GP in Wiltshire with a diploma in family planning and sexual health and further training in perimenopause and menopause.
Please note: this episode is for information only and isn't medical advice. If you're worried about your symptoms, speak to your GP.
 
Info:https://www.womens-health-concern.org/help-and-advice/factsheets/
End Credits
This episode was written and recorded by me and produced by Lucy Lucraft (lucylucraft.co.uk). If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a 5* rating and review!
 

This week I'm joined by Nikki, a much-loved old family friend, who has just turned 50. She's a former primary school teacher and senior leader who now supports women to show up in their lives in a connected, embodied and powerful way.
Nikki shares how her forties turned into a deep invitation to come back to herself. We talk about learning to hold firm, warm boundaries, and about perimenopause as a paradigm shift rather than something to fear. We also get into why women still have to advocate so hard for themselves, and how the simplest acts of connection can be the most powerful. Nikki finishes by guiding us through a short somatic practice you can try at home.
Key Takeaways
Boundaries can be firm and warm. Nikki learned to hold them by listening to her body rather than getting tangled up in her thoughts.
Perimenopause can be an opening, not an ending. Nikki sees it as a paradigm shift and the start of a "second season", and she's honest about the brain fog too.
Small, simple things make the biggest difference. Eating together, being truly seen, dancing to a favourite song or taking a dip in a river all count.
Your body gives you information. Noticing where a feeling shows up physically helps you name it, and pausing before you respond helps you communicate better.
Community helps us advocate. The more women share their experiences, the easier it is to speak up for ourselves and each other.
Episode Highlights
02:00: Nikki shares how her forties unfolded, including the health scare that made her put herself first
07:30: How kinesiology helped Nikki listen to her body and learn to hold "elite" boundaries
11:30: Perimenopause, brain fog and why Nikki sees it as a paradigm shift
20:30: Why women still need such high self-advocacy in healthcare, and how community can help
27:00: The power of simply being seen, and easy ways to reconnect with your family and yourself
35:00: Interoception explained: how to listen to your body's signals and name what you're feeling
45:00: Nikki guides us through a short somatic practice
About the Guest
Nikki is a coach and facilitator who supports women to feel more like themselves and step into their own leadership.
Website: https://moremyself.uk
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nikki.racey?stkn=enlpb3pyczB1eXF3
Mentioned in the Episode
Kinesiology (muscle testing) and Nikki's kinesiologist, Ali: [ADD LINK]
Internal Family Systems / "parts work"
The Diary of a CEO podcast
Bristol Heart Institute
End Credits
This episode was written and recorded by me and produced by Lucy Lucraft (lucylucraft.co.uk). If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a 5* rating and review!

Everyone online is telling us to lift weights, but nobody seems to explain why. In this episode I'm joined by my friend Aoife, a personal trainer and group fitness instructor who specialises in strength training through perimenopause and menopause. I worked with Aoife before I'd ever picked up a weight, and her passion for helping women feel strong is completely infectious.
We talk about what's happening with our hormones, why keeping our lean muscle mass matters so much, and how to fit strength work into a busy life without the guilt. We also get into bone density, jumping, pelvic floor health and the "I'll get bulky" myth. If you've ever felt unheard when you've said "something doesn't feel right", this one is for you.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Lifting weights isn't a trend. Maintaining lean muscle mass supports our strength, posture and independence, and helps us to live well for longer.- Something is better than nothing. The textbook says two to three sessions a week, but ten minutes counts, so don't set yourself up to fail.- Bones need impact as well as muscle. Bone density peaks around 30, and jumping (even off the bottom stair) helps.- Think "engage" rather than "brace" for your core and pelvic floor, and get your pelvic floor checked if you have any concerns.- Talking about perimenopause matters. Sharing stories helps us to advocate for ourselves, and you are worth showing up for.
EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS
- 02:00: Why we should be lifting weights, and why perimenopause can begin as early as 35- 04:00: Oestrogen "dipping and diving" like the sea, and why lean muscle mass is the goal- 08:00: How often should we lift? Aoife on why any amount beats none- 16:00: Bone density, the Aero versus Crunchie analogy, and why jumping matters- 19:00: Pelvic floor, breathing and core: why engaging beats bracing- 28:00: Busting the "I'll get bulky" myth and taking up space
ABOUT THE GUEST
Aoife is a personal trainer and group fitness instructor who specialises in strength training for women in perimenopause and menopause.- Website: - Instagram: 
MENTIONED IN THE EPISODE
Instagram @aoifemeldonpt 
 
 
- Leah Burn, the physiotherapist whose course on pelvic floor and lifting Aoife recommends:https://www.instagram.com/leahbryansphysio?stkn=NTF5cHZibWUzcnF0
- Lifting weights, jumping and pelvic floor checks: see Aoife's links above for more
This episode was written and recorded by me and produced by Lucy Lucraft (lucylucraft.co.uk). If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a 5* rating and review!

Welcome back to This is 40. I’m by myself again today, we had a minor technical issue with my scheduled guest, Aoife, but I'll have her on the show next week!
 
In this solo episode, I share a deeply personal look into what's been happening in my world recently. Following my first therapy session to process the passing of my mother, I explore the invisible emotional labour we carry as women, the physical toll of stored emotions, and why we cannot truly step into our forties "fuck it" phase without first creating spaces where we feel safe enough to release.
Key Takeaways
Safety Enables Release: True emotional release—and stepping fully into your "fuck it" era. Can only happen when you feel safe enough to drop the weight of daily responsibilities.
Listen to Your Body's Wisdom: Stored emotion can physically manifest; pausing to check in with how your body feels helps decode what you truly need.
Boundaries Model a Legacy: Setting firm boundaries isn't just self-care, it teaches our children that their boundaries deserve to be respected too.
Break the Unspoken Labour Cycle: Women often carry the bulk of invisible emotional and domestic labour, making it vital to deliberately reclaim space for ourselves.
Episode Highlights
01:10 – Processing grief, relocating to Scotland, and crying for the first time since my mother's funeral.
02:40 – The invisible emotional labour of women and the challenge of finding a space to crumble when managing everything solo.
13:40 – Weekly Challenge: Setting one firm, unshakeable boundary for yourself this week.
End Credits
This episode was written and recorded by me and produced by Lucy Lucraft (lucylucraft.co.uk). If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a 5* rating and review!

In this solo episode, I get honest and personal about the frustrating weight changes and body shifts that happen in our 40s.
About the Host: 
Follow me on Instagram: @jettevirdi
Follow the podcast: @this_is_40podcast 
Mentioned in the Episode
Red Light Therapy Panels – Used for daily 10-minute relaxation, skin, and sleep benefits.
Sarah – Guest from Episode 4 mentioned for her advice on taking "sacred pauses".
Aoife – Personal trainer previewed for the upcoming Episode 6.
End Credits
This episode was written and recorded by me and produced by Lucy Lucraft (lucylucraft.co.uk). If you enjoyed this episode please leave a 5* rating and review!

Welcome back to This Is 40! In today's episode, I am joined by my very first guest, my wonderful friend Sarah! Sarah is a somatic sexologist, a somatic experiencing practitioner, and a yoga teacher based in Moray.
In this episode, we dive deep into what "somatic" actually means and how we can re-establish connection with our bodies as we enter our 40s and the perimenopausal phase.
 
We chat about dismantling the deep-seated shame surrounding female sexuality and genital terms, learning how to advocate for our health with doctors, navigating changing sex drives, and why pleasure isn't just about penetrative sex, it's a way of living and "flirting with life".
To wrap up, Sarah leads us through a beautiful, grounding somatic practice that you can follow along with at home.
Key Takeaways
Somatic Connection Means Internal Felt Awareness: Somatic practices stem from soma (the body) and invite us to focus on our internal felt experience and inhabit our bodies fully.
Language Builds Advocacy and Reduces Shame: Reclaiming non-taboo terms for our genitalia helps dissolve shame and allows us to communicate clearly and confidently with healthcare providers.
Sexuality Experiences Seasons: Sexual desire fluctuates throughout our lives. Embracing "wintering" phases with compassion—and separating intimacy from the expectation of penetrative sex—can keep connection alive without pressure.
Pleasure is More Than Genital-Based: True pleasure is our connection to life force energy. We can access "pockets of pleasure" throughout the day using simple sensory pauses and daily check-ins.
Episode Highlights
00:00:52 – What does "somatic" actually mean?
00:06:40 – Reclaiming taboo words, understanding genital anatomy, and shedding female sexual shame.
00:11:00 – Practical embodiment exercises (like the "power pose") for clinic visits.
00:14:38 – Reframing body changes: Viewing our bodies through a relationship lens rather than a clinical one.
00:21:40 – Navigating low libido and "wintering" in relationships without losing intimacy.
00:28:10 – Less "fucks given" in perimenopause: Establishing boundaries drop by drop.
00:38:40 – Guided somatic practice: Tuning in to pleasurable movement and nervous system regulation.
About the Guest
Sarah is a somatic sexologist, somatic experiencing™ practitioner (nervous system-focused trauma therapy), a yoga & breathwork instructor and a women’s wellness facilitator.  
 
She supports people to reconnect with bodies, their power and pleasure through movement, breath, awareness & nervous-system education. to support emotional resilience, reduce stress and to support more fulfilling relationships, deeper intimacy and more pleasure & aliveness. 
 
She holds 1:1 sessions, workshops and group sessions, online and in-person in Moray to support emotional resilience, reduce stress and to support more fulfilling relationships, deeper intimacy and more pleasure, joy & aliveness.  She also guides embodied movement classes inspired by Scotland’s beautiful and wild nature.
Website sarahkcollins.com
 Booking: email sarah.wildermoons@gmail.com
Instagram: @wildermoons
Mentioned in the Episode
Mama Gina – Creator of the morning vulva check-in practice ("Good morning, pussy") @mamagena on instagram.
Tara Brach – Mindfulness teacher, author, and creator of the "Sacred Pause" concept.
The Sexual Integration Institute @integrativeintimacycoaching
@vitamethod
Some free resources:
Vulva anatomy workshop from vaginamuseum
A guide to vaginal dryness
 
 
This episode was written and recorded by me and produced by Lucy Lucraft.
If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a 5* rating and review!

In this deeply personal episode, I share my candid experience with clitoral atrophy and vulvodynia. I highlight the systemic issues surrounding women's health education, the long delays in receiving accurate diagnoses, and the vital importance of advocating for yourself at the doctor's office.
It's a personal but OH SO practical episode for all you peri-menopausers out there.
Key Takeaways
Advocate Relentlessly for Your Health: Do not settle for quick, off-the-shelf fixes like thrush cream if symptoms persist; push your doctor for clear answers and specialised care.
Understand Genitourinary Symptoms: Conditions like clitoral atrophy and vulvodynia are common aspects of the perimenopause transition, yet they are frequently underdiagnosed or delayed due to a lack of education and clinical training.
Break the Stigma: Open conversations about female anatomy, sexual desire, and bodily changes after 40 are essential for quality of life and proper medical support.
Explore Treatment Options: Localised topical oestrogen, HRT adjustments, and testosterone are potential paths to explore with a healthcare provider to alleviate physical discomfort and support tissue health.
Episode Highlights
00:04:00 – Explaining clitoral anatomy, oestrogen decline, and the reality of clitoral atrophy.
00:06:30 – Highlighting statistics around genitourinary syndrome of menopause (GSM) and diagnosis delays.
00:10:30 – Examining the cultural shame, vague language, and gaps in GP training regarding women's sexual health.
00:16:30 – Navigating shifting diagnoses, vulvodynia, and managing ongoing pelvic pain.
00:18:30 – Breakdown of non-hormonal and hormonal treatment options, including topical estrogen and testosterone.
00:21:00 – Reframing menopause as a "second springtime" and empowering listeners to advocate for their wellbeing.
About the Host
Follow me on Instagram: @jettevirdi
Follow the podcast: @this_is_40podcast 
Mentioned in the Episode
Dr. Louise Newson: Women's health specialist and menopause expert (Follow on Instagram: @drlouisenewson)
End Credits
This episode was written and recorded by me and produced by Lucy Lucraft (lucylucraft.co.uk).
If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a 5* rating and review!

In this episode, I delve into the often unsaid truths of entering our forties and the sudden arrival of perimenopause. From unexpected middle-of-the-night anxiety and shifting bodies to the fear of becoming invisible as we age, I discuss what is really going on beneath the surface. We break down the societal pressures that keep us from being completely honest with our GPs, partners, and friends, and why we need to stop suffering in silence.
Key Takeaways
Perimenopause can feel like an abrupt transition rather than a slow drift, often bringing sudden symptoms like weight retention, insomnia, and new headaches.
Mid-night racing hearts and sudden anxiety are often driven by falling oestrogen levels, not personal flaws or stress alone.
Social pressure and tight 10-minute GP appointments frequently prevent women from speaking up about their health concerns.
We need to dismantle the shame surrounding women’s health to gain clarity, proper care, and authentic connection.
Episode Highlights
00:00:43 - The struggle of identifying perimenopause symptoms without proper language or education.
00:03:15 - Audience responses: sex drive changes, menopause worries, and the fear of feeling invisible.
00:04:22 - Navigating sudden physical changes, sleepless nights, and unexpected headaches.
00:06:17 - Unpacking hormonal anxiety and the connection to dropping oestrogen levels.
00:08:15 - Why societal norms and heavy expectations keep us quiet about our health.
00:12:15 - Essential book recommendations to help navigate perimenopause and menopause.
Mentioned in the Episode
MenoPausing by Dr Naomi Potter and Davina McCall
The Definitive Guide to Perimenopause and Menopause by Dr Louise Newson
Cracking the Menopause by Mariella Frostrup and Alice Smellie
Dr Louise Newson on Instagram (@menopause_doctor)
Dr Naomi Potter
Peri Community
This episode was written and recorded by me, Jette Verdi, and produced by Lucy Lucraft (lucylucraft.co.uk). If you enjoyed this episode please leave a 5* rating and review and find us @this_is_40podcast on Instagram.
 

I’m Jette, your host, a single mama living in Scotland, and a Pilates studio owner. I am currently 43, and babe, things have changed. I didn't get a gradual transition into my forties; I woke up one morning and thought, what is going on with my body? From cellulite, mood changes, and weight gain to unexplainable headaches and clitoral atrophy, I found myself crying to doctors who simply told me, "You're just getting old. Welcome to perimenopause."
In this inaugural episode, I share my personal story and set out the mission for This is 40. We are done being told that feeling this way is just something we have to accept. I want to create a collective, shared space where we dive into the language, tests, and self-advocacy tools we need to start feeling like ourselves again.
We’re going to cover health, money, sex, relationships, and all the juicy stuff in between. Welcome to the ride!
Episode Highlights:
00:00:00 – Welcome to Episode One of This is 40!
00:00:50 – Who I am: 43, single mom, Pilates studio owner, and living in Scotland.
00:01:20 – The sudden shift: Sudden physical changes, perimenopause symptoms, and doctor visits.
00:02:10 – The frustration of being told "You're just getting old".
00:02:40 – The mission of the podcast: Learning to advocate for our health and demand tests.
00:03:30 – Why women's health is severely under-researched.
00:04:10 – What to expect from future episodes: Experts, real women, money, sex, and health.
00:05:00 – Breaking the taboos: Experiencing clitoral atrophy in your 40s.
00:05:50 – Join the community and connect on social media.
This episode was written and recorded by me and produced by Lucy Lucraft (lucylucraft.co.uk).
If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a 5* rating and review!

Welcome to This is 40, a podcast dedicated to women in their forties who are done being told that what they are experiencing is 'normal and fine' (because we know we aren't!)
Hosted by me, Jette Virdi, a single mum, Pilates teacher, and lifelong asker of uncomfortable question, this show dives into the real, raw topics your GP doesn't have time to explain and most podcasts are too polite to mention. From perimenopause and brain fog to sex, money, and identity, get ready for honest, expert-backed conversations without the wellness waffle.
Episode Highlights:
00:00 – Welcome: Asking the questions you were too embarrassed to Google
00:20 – Meet me: Single mum, Pilates instructor, and podcast host
00:35 – Why This is 40 exists and who it is for
00:45 – The expert lineup: From neuroscientists to finance specialists
01:00 – The real topics covered: Perimenopause, sex after 40, brain fog, and identity
End Credits:
If you enjoyed this episode please leave a 5* rating and review!
This episode was written and recorded by me and produced by Lucy Lucraft (lucylucraft.co.uk).